Those who wrestle with life

This weekend some one told me he couldn't stand people who didn't wrestle with life. He felt like most people weren't thinking, weren't read, weren't trying, were just "doing the netflix thing". He also talked about how in New York City everyone materialism was everything and status was based on how many things you have. This was in the context of talking about how he met his  potential girlfriend, a epic saga which took an hour to tell even though they had not been on their second date yet.

He bothered me. I can think of several reasons why. First, that I realized I didn't measure up to what he wanted in a girlfriend. I had and have no desire for that position but something in me always wants to measure up to everyone's standards. Second because he, after living there a year, spoke with such authority on a city I spent eighteen years practically next to but never really knew. I don't like to feel so inexperienced about things I really should know about and meeting someone who knew so much more annoys me even though it shouldn't.
I think, however, the real reason his words troubled me was the boxes he but people in. He was constantly contrasting those who think and those who don't, those who are materialistic and those who aren't, those who are from the Midwest and those who are from the east coast. In fact he mentioned how glad he was that she was from the midwest and was therefore much less driven by materialism and was much kinder than some one raised around NYC. I have a hard time classifying people like that. Perhaps it is because I have a father who in many ways choose to be as different as possible from those he grew up with and a mother who grew up as a "gaijin" in a country that worships racial purity. I grew up home schooled in a place where that was extremely rate. My friends where those who likewise didn't fit with the suburban culture. I have difficulty classifying people based on where they are from.

I've wondered since then if I "wrestle with life". I do read, theology, fiction, fantasy, poetry, but I don't think I truly wrestle with what I read. So often I am looking for comfort rather than thought, easy answers rather than hard problems. Perhaps we just have different personalities and gifts or perhaps I am missing out on what God had for a life I'd wrestle with.

Photo credit: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vayishlach